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Windows XP

by Ray Ingles

sung to the tune of "Ray of Light" by Madonna

Errors on my screen tonight I wonder
Are my cries of warning heard by anyone
Bill Gates wants the universe and quickly
Now this Windows XP threatens everyone

I don't steal, but it's calling home
Is this real?

And it runs like a lump of stone
What's the deal?

Faster than the speeding light it crashes
While it starts rebooting I scream and wring my hands
They promised me a little piece of heaven
But it won't run Java and MP3's are gone

And my apps are so slow they groan
Such a deal

And support won't pick up the phone
Should I yield?

My network LED won't light
My USB devices fight
Disk space's gotten very tight

Nothing but blue screens tonight I wonder
What could have possessed me to go and buy this bomb
Bill Gates wants the universe and quickly
Now the DOJ has given up and run
Bend and kneel

Quicker than a ray of light
I reach for
The reinstall CD there
Through my endless tears

Bill Gates wants the universe
Wants to own the universe
Plans to run the universe

And it feels
And it feels
And it feels like a broken bone
And it feels

Wonder if it's time to try out Linux*
Maybe I should just upgrade to Linux

(*pronounced "Lye-nucks" here)